Fear... check.

Anger.... check.

Disgust...... ✅✅✅.

Now you're STUCK here, but how do you get out? How do you get UNstuck

If you are going through one of the six big emotions you're not really in a place to... well, to do much of anything of value.

✨Today, I'm sharing with you specific steps that will help you move from one of the six big emotions to a state of joy so that you can get your life back and experience lasting emotional wellness. ✨

We have talked before about TRUE CHANGE that comes from the inside out. That unless we experience freedom in our spiritual life, addressing the other areas will just act as a bandaid. A relationship with Jesus is the only way to experience true, lasting change. 

Did you experience any of the big SIX emotions this week - maybe even this morning?? Yes?

While some parts of your life have begun to look more like a bad movie😞😡, your kids aren't going to let you off the hook. You still have to show up and get things done, parent your kids, serve your clients, and be a productive part of your community. So let's look at some tools that can help you move from emotionally struggling and back to joy.

Ready to take back control of your emotions?

What do you think about this statement: "You can't be spiritually mature unless you are emotionally mature."?

Have you ever been STUCK in a negative emotional state (aka, the BIG SIX)? What was that like?

In thinking back to the statement... "You can't be spiritually mature unless you are emotionally mature," The Bible says "They will know us by our love". - We can't actively love God or others when we get STUCK in on one of these BIG SIX emotions.

Let's talk about it this way:

The right side of the brain (aka, the "feeling" brain) works faster than the left side of the brain (aka, the "thinking brain"). So you experience emotions BEFORE you think it through. We talked about this concept on a previous Free Friday about protecting our children's brains from pornography -  and we talked a bit about this. 

The amygdala of our brain is responsible for deciding when it is time for us to be in fight, flight, or freeze mode.  We physically cannot operate out of love when we are operating out of the amygdala. Literally, our relational circuits have been turned OFF. If our relational circuits are off, the best way to get them back on and get the two "brains" back in sync is through APPRECIATION or GRATITUDE.

When we compare this to the second greatest commandment our Creator ever gave -  "Love your neighbor as yourself," it is clear that we are not able to love other people when we are operating out of the big SIX emotions which means that the relational circuits in our brain have shut off.

So how do we get unstuck, and Return to JOY?

First - "The thing is not the thing."

We, as followers of Yeshua, are called to regulate these emotions by the power of the Holy Spirit. That's God's Spirit that lives within every person who has given their lives to Yeshua (Jesus).

1. Recognize we are experiencing a big emotion - call it out! Let's not deny the existence of the emotion. Be honest about it.

2. Get perspective. Be open to the possibility that we can be out of it.

3. Invite God into the situation because He exists and He cares. This can be as simple as saying, "God, would you help me?"

4. Give appreciation or gratitude. Genuinely reflect on something you are grateful for. It is not enough to give a trite answer. For this to begin the process of returning you to joy you must "experience" the thing for which you are grateful.

5. Now, remember a story of how you were able to recover from a big emotion. It gives us hope that this kind of change can happen again.

6. Name the emotion and share it with someone else.

When you tell YOUR story to others at least three times, it synchronizes the left & right brain!

An emotionally mature person can return to joy in 90 seconds! They have regulated the "sadness" and they've seen the emotion as an opportunity to grow. I invite you this week to think of a time you experienced one of the big SIX and how you returned to joy. - Share it with someone. Ideally, write it out first so you can stay succinct and not go on and on with your story. (Try not to make it super intense so that others aren't uncomfortable. For example, when a friend shared the story of losing her child in a car accident, she was very generic about the things that happened, and wasn't dramatic in her descriptions, even though the actual details were quite dramatic.) 

Before we wrap up let's address the elephant in the room. There are some people who have experienced a trauma that is dramatic enough that they are unable to cope with the emotions of the situation. Very often traumas have a way of hijacking the nervous system and derailing any attempts to come back to a point of shalom, or peace. Fortunately, when this is the case we have tools that can help give your nervous system a "nudge" in the right direction so you can get back on the path to emotional healing. If you feel like you are in that place then please reach out to me and let's have a conversation about how to reset your nervous system.

I'm going to share my own story of FEAR below. It's a simple one, but it shows you these steps and how I returned to joy.

🎥 Click the video below for the full story... and an opportunity to heal.